So.. I just realised that I was meant to declare any base/library code prior to work on LD. Didn't realise this til now. I've been using my homebrew canvas (https://github.com/dafrancis/Juicy) there's a few differences in the version in this game (work I haven't pushed to github yet)

My interpretation was tenseconds or tense conds. I'm not sure how often condiments is shortened to conds but somehow I imagined a jar with a really tight lid on it. This game is where you have to open a jar. I am sorry.

I should also note that the only other external resource I used was the "A Safe Place to Fall" font, which is free for personal use (if http://www.dafont.com/a-safe-place-to-fall.font is telling the truth)