This is short horror/thriller story created in twine. One of my first experiences working with twine. The story is not appropriate for ages under 18. With high warning, this story contains dark content and maybe unsettling to some readers. It has no affiliation with any events or real people. The entire story is fiction and should not be taken seriously.
This was created as part of the 'You are the Monster Jam' to highlight some of the narrative techniques for approaching delicate content.
I enjoyed reading though this, it would have been good to have a few more choices to help engage the player, but I appreciate you were trying to tell a story to fit with the theme. Well done on your first LD!
Thanks a lot! Was really trying to expand the choices but its just doubled and tripled the workload at each choice. Some firm planning needs doing next time.
Played trough it a few times to see most of the content. Somewhat disappointing that my choices didn't seem to matter all that much, but I guess it's no wonder since the setting only allows for a few rooms to be explored. The story, while short, was pretty interesting and in my opinion well written.
- interesting story, I was riveted
- good take on the theme
- extremely linear, needs more branching to be called a proper game. even just one off things a player could examine for extra detail.
- multiple endings would help, at least a good and bad ending
- art was a good idea to help grab the player but doesn't match the story. maybe I missed it but I don't remember anything about a rose and it doesn't seem to make sense in the context
I liked how well written it is and the use of the theme.
Needed more branching to really make it interactive (if it is too linear it is not really a game!)
Very descriptive story, I have a lot of clear visual images while reading through it. It feels like it wants to be bigger than it is, but it's a really good start.
- good take on the theme
- extremely linear, needs more branching to be called a proper game. even just one off things a player could examine for extra detail.
- multiple endings would help, at least a good and bad ending
- art was a good idea to help grab the player but doesn't match the story. maybe I missed it but I don't remember anything about a rose and it doesn't seem to make sense in the context
Needed more branching to really make it interactive (if it is too linear it is not really a game!)