This has been an unusual LD for me. I want to try to figure out what I’m going to do and share with y’all why I’ve barely made anything. I apologize if it comes out as a rant.

I’m usually really keen to take part of the compo and give it my best. At the same time, I don’t really care with the results. I’m really in for the complete experience: *slaughtering themes, voting, making a game and playing/commenting on all your awesome games. (*yeah, I’ve always skipped the suggestion phase…)

I also enjoy the aspect of putting down my current project/whatever for sometime and try doing something new and/or different. It’s always great to see how much I’m able to accomplish in a single weekend.

And there’s a part of me that doesn’t want to break my streak… I’ve been able to successfully enter a new game every compo, even when I trashed my previous idea late during the first day and would be away for most of the second.

This time, however, I haven’t been able to fully focus from the beginning.

It started with the theme. I was pretty disappointed with it and couldn’t come up with any usable idea before going to sleep (the theme was announced at midnight, here). The following morning, I woke up even before the alarm rang, only so less time was “wasted” sleeping…

The idea I was able to come up with was quite… weak. The theme felt unnecessary and the game could work just fine without it. (The game was also a bad ripoff of another game’s mechanic.) But I don’t want to ignore it. I feel that ignoring the theme is ignoring a big part of the event. Also, if I were to ignore the theme and make anything, why not simply work on my current project? That would be more productive, but it would also mean skipping the event… This thought kept looming around, and was a big factor on my procrastinating through most of the day.

I still think I have more than enough time to wrap up my current entry. It wouldn’t be as polished as it could had been, but it would be something. But then, I get caught up on these thoughts…

• I don’t want to force myself to finish the game for the sake of finishing it
• But I don’t want to skip an event
• At the same time, I want to prove to myself that I am able to overcome all that and finish something
• and so on…

Well… I don’t know. I’m off to sleep. I’ll leave the decision (to continue or to give up) to my future, rested self. (who’ll probably be in a better mood…)